Calling

Abraham Joshua Heschel once said, “It is not enough for me to ask the question; I want to know how to answer the one question that seems to encompass everything I face: What am I here for?”  Like Heschel I also long to discern the answer to the “one question.” I suppose these thoughts are triggered by my realization that any qualification I thought I had to live and work in Kotido were idealistic. However, when I look at my faith community both in North America, and here in Uganda I wonder if “calling” is actually much simpler than I originally thought. None of my friends or family has been called though a burning bush, or given a covenant promise of children outnumbering the stars, but I don’t believe that makes them any less called to do the work they are passionately pursuing.

My observations about “calling” were further shaped a few weekends ago when my host family invited me to attend an ordination service at their church. I was curious about what a Catholic ordination might look like so I readily agreed to attend with them. The service did not disappoint me; there was a huge processional with many groups accompanying the Catholic priests from all over Uganda to the front podium, three choirs were present and performed many selections, and the cathedral had been decorated with yellow flags to symbolize the Holy Spirit coming down.

My favorite part of the service occurred when the facilitating priest announced that it was time for the candidate to come forward; he asked, “Is the man there? Or perhaps he has become frightened and run away.” People laughed; but, from somewhere in the back, the nominee jumped out of his seat and shouted, “I am here.” With his family beside him, they all danced forward joyfully. The congregation was delighted; people burst into song and the ululations were deafening.

The purpose of the ordination was to publicly recognize the new priest; but, the occasion held additional meanings for me. First, it reminded me that our calling from God should be joyfully received; and second, we are surrounded by our faith community for encouragement and support as we pursue that call. Perhaps calling is merely being enthusiastic about the passions God has given us; and using these gift to live with acute awareness that the Kingdom is coming, and every day we are the builders in that Kingdom.

Doubting Thomas

Every day as I walk from my home to the Church of Uganda and back again, I am confronted by the community of Kotido: I pass children hauling water to their homes because the dry season has been severe and many taps across the town have dried up. I can be assured of at least one encounter with a beggar—typically an older woman who looks like she has not eaten in days. And, I will see groups of men gathered around gourds of local brew; spending their money and time on an oppressive addiction which abuses not only themselves, but also their families.

Initially these people surprised me. As a middle class North American it was hard for me to see children surrendering to housework instead of being educated (in the past months I have come to understand education is quite expensive, even though the government insists the service is free. Somehow the money is being swallowed, perhaps by the government workers themselves or perhaps by school leadership, regardless, education is not free.) I struggled to know how to respond to the mama’s asking for food when both my wallet and stomach have always been full and never experienced what it is like to be hungry or wanting. And, when I saw various men in town simply drinking their lives and finances away, I became angry; not only with their disregard for their families, but also their lack of discipline and motivation.

On a recent visit to Kotido from the States my dad commented, “I don’t know how you take it all in Annali, I’m not sure how to process all this.” His words convicted me; I had actually not been “processing” at all. It had become easier to merely accept life as it is rather than to recognize how abysmal the situations actually are and to grapple with how I fit into it all.

My dad has always been consciences; attempting to leave a light carbon footprint and being mindful about his global citizenship to the Church. He walks or rides his bike to work, he always reminds the family to turn off lights we are not using, and stop the water from running while we are brushing our teeth. He is constantly picking up trash and sorting out recyclables, and his sensitivity to the church is evident through his daily Bible study, and discipleship to the Church. It was bizarre to hear him say he “did not know how to take it all in.” It seemed to me he had been “taking it all in” his entire life. Without needing to see the inequality he was already sensitive to it, and was certainly doing what he could to alleviate the disparities.

And my dad is not alone; every year thousands of people gather to volunteer and participate in MCC relief sales, work at MCC thrift shops, and help with MCC meat canning. Mennonite churches all over the USA gather change to donate to penny power, an offering project to work at water development all over the world. Some of these folks have never seen the injustices they are working to improve; they just know that Jesus has called us to love our neighbor as ourselves.

In reflecting upon the conversation with my dad the story of Thomas from John 20:24-30 came to mind. The disciples tell Thomas they have seen Jesus alive; but, Thomas says, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my fingers where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” (vs. 25b) A week later the disciples are gathered together and Jesus stands among them again. He says to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” (vs. 27) Thomas believes after that encounter but Jesus tells him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (vs. 29)

The church is the new manifestation of Christ’s body in the world, and I am grateful for a rich denominational heritage that has always put an emphasis on being aware of the global church. MCC was initially started to help Mennonite brothers and sisters struggling in Russia, and the history of the growth of the Mennonite church has largely been told from this European perspective. In the February edition of The Mennonite professor at Goshen College, John D. Roth , wrote about a new way to understand Mennonite church history and discern where the Mennonite church is going. In his article entitled, “1948 Meeting Reoriented our Thinking” he writes, “What if what God had in mind from the beginning of the movement, with the first baptism on January 21, 1521, was not Mennonite Church USA but 1.7 million Anabaptist Mennonite’s around the globe? How would we need to tell our history different if this was where God’s narrative was heading all along?” Furthermore, Roth writes that out of the entire Anabaptist church only 6% are worshipping in North America, the other 94% is spread throughout the world. The church is growing, alive and extremely active!

I am a doubting Thomas. I must see the children struggling under their loads of water, listen to the mama’s asking for food, and watch the men drink their local brew. I need to see, hear, and touch the inequalities in the global church to truly understand the wounds it is carrying. And, like Thomas I am confronted with the living, growing Jesus, but a body that needs healing and support. “….blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.”